Consider the lesser species

We found a lovely big scallop shell while we were strolling on the beach.

The tide was far out - Newfoundland, i think - and we walked for miles across the sands and round the ragged rocks.

Then there was the scallop, complete and with seaweed attached; the kind of shell you buy on holiday, with a photograph of Elvis or the pope inside.

"Is it dead?"

"Yep"

And so it joined us on our walk.

"There's something inside it."

"Elvis?... "

"It's very heavy..."

"It was his diet"

"Might be alive..."

"He fell in the toilet."

And so we put the scallop back in the water.

Big trouble on the beach

Now i'm for it. Seems Alexander and Sammy left their bucket and spade on the beach yesterday. Tourism chiefs are looking for the culprits; folding their arms and putting their hands in their pockets.